Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm passing your future prison.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
