Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
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