Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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