What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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