twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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