This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
