i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
