Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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