Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
