sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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