found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
