guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
