It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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