The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
