i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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