Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I didn't notice because vodka
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
