You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
