Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
