I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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