Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
