Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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