Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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