But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
