i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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