just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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