Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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