i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
