You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
