I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
