we're blogging at a bar
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
