from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
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