She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
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