There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
