my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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