but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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