i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
