ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
