Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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