i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
