Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
