it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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