I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize