Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
