Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize