i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Terrible idea I love it
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
