i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
