Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
