The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize