so explain again why im purple
no
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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