he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
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