Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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